Feeling Empty

Feeling empty is one of the worst feelings in this world. I can handle being happy. I can manage being sad. Being depressed and angry, not so much. But feeling nothing at all, doing nothing, looking forward to nothing, feeling like there’s nothing going on in your life, feeling like you’re not living at all, feeling that emptiness in your heart, yet feeling how it weighs you down. I CAN’T HANDLE THAT.

I haven’t been writing anything in a while because that’s what I feel: nothing. I’m not even sad, or restless.

I haven’t been doing anything because there’s really nothing much to do except to mope around and wallow myself in self-pity, which I’ve been tired of doing.

I’m looking forward to nothing because I’m at a point in my life again where I don’t see my future clearly.

It’s like all I can write about now is my headache. All I can do now is lie on my bed and stare at the ceiling, wishing for my headache to go away.

And as for my future to look forward to; I guess it would just be that: a distant future.

 

I feel like I’m not moving forward.

I feel like I’m just here in this world, existing, doing routines, but not really doing anything.

I feel like I’m not living my life.

 

I feel empty inside.

 

They say you can’t feel something if there’s nothing in there. But what about this feeling of emptiness that is within me?

 

 

-Jun22’14

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