Some people have ways to distract themselves from self-harming; or have alternatives to self-harm.
I don’t. Aside from writing, that is.
I tried hitting a punching bag. Didn’t really help me; at least in this matter.
I tried running/jogging, but I’m not that fit for running so instead I always got crazy palpitations and deprived-of-oxygen calves.
I can’t curl up under a comforter or even a blanket, because it’s hot where I live.
I can’t divert my attention to a book; I just keep on reading the same paragraph over and over.
I don’t want to focus on my breathing, because I find it harder to breathe when I’m hyper aware of my breathing.
I used to snap my wrist with a rubber band, but then I realized (I read it somewhere) it’s just another form of self-harming; and what I want is to take my mind off of it.
I sometimes listen to music; but I almost always end up listening to sad/melancholic songs, in turn making me more depressed.
Right now I can handle my urges to self-harm. I don’t seem to have them these past few months, anyway.
I handle my depression by writing. But aside from that, I do nothing.
What I don’t know is how to quell my anxiety.
And well, how to stop my paranoid (I don’t know if I’m using the right word) thoughts.